Not All Men Hate Women
Respect is earned, not just given
Geez. Where do I start ? Geez, how do I start ? I know where and how I’d like to finish. I certainly don’t want to lose people after a word, a line or a paragraph. If this comes off as political, it’s not really intended to be, although reference to the election needs to be mentioned. It’s all of the nonsensical childish crap that’s out there over the last day or two in the wake of the (I don’t know why I say this but) surprising results. It’s the real world. Not everyone is happy. Point is taken.
Let’s start with this. Kamala Harris did not lose the election because she is a) a woman or b) she is black (which she is not) or c) she is a black woman. No, she lost it because she is not very bright, is not qualified, slept her way to where she is (which wouldn’t be so bad if she was qualified) and way too many people have caught on to the charade and made their statements at the ballot box. The only people that have any reason to cry and blubber all over the media are the hundreds if not thousands who worked in her campaign and saw their efforts flushed down the toilet. Most, not all, of the unwarranted overdramatic tears, have been seen to be female millennials with no ability of independent thought who believed this was a show up and it would be handed to them. It doesn’t, or at least shouldn’t, be that way. That’s all bad enough.
But it’s things like this that is utterly driving me bonkers. I can’t get past the first sentence of garbage like this fast enough and immediately have to just shake my head in disbelief. Why do so many women continue to push the woe is me, everyone hates us garbage? It’s brought on by yourselves. Have you all fallen into the modern day I don’t have to work for anything and it should be given to me just because _________(fill in the blank). Why do so many women continue to degrade themselves so damn much. Why is there such a belief that no one needs to work for and/or earn anything anymore ? Sometimes, you get what you ask for and when you get it, you don’t like it.
Guess what. There’s as many weak males out there as females. Generally, they don’t whine too long about it, take their medicine and move on.
Hopefully, I still have everyone. Because, what I am going to do here is try and show just how many strong, capable, hard working women around that are willing to play the hand dealt and work towards their successes.
In my 60+ years on this earth, I’ve been fortunate to have been influenced by and associated with many strong and able women. I’ve been very fortunate. It doesn’t mean I always agree. My wife (one of those strong ones) will attest to that. But from the start they’ve been there. It could be how they were brought up, life experiences, associating with the right people or just damn good fortune.
Obviously, first and foremost is mom 😇. I’m lucky to have had a woman like her to guide me through my early years. I’m lucky she didn’t have the beliefs then what so many have now. If she did, there’s a chance I wouldn’t be here right now. In a lot of ways, she might have been stronger than dad, but we were kind of trained in those days to fear dad more 😉. But, mom was always there, a strong disciplinarian who had the shoulder to cry on when needed but stern when that was necessary too. She wasn’t the career gal in the strict sense but did work through most of my childhood. When dad died, she was more than capable of continuing on. I miss her, think of her and thank her every day.
I have to give credit to my grammar school teachers - 85% who were female (and very few as nuns). They were career women, strong women, leaders. They needed legitimate degrees in those days. Some were moms, some not. But they were there day in and day out for their classes, for us. They worked hard and for the ones that did, it showed. They were true motivators, influencers, leaders, although at 7, 8, or 9 years old what would I care, know, appreciate or understand. They taught classes - math, language, science. The only resemblance of an agenda was religion - I went to a Catholic school - and religion was the base for how you acted towards and around other people. Not to much - me only - it was all !
Through the years, I was truly fortunate to interact with strong women. When I was in my 20s, working in the travel biz I had the fortune of being around 4 of the strongest women around at my first Travel Agency. The owner, Roberta Fisher, was a highly respected older woman who had 2 offices, operated a travel school (which I attended) and had contacts throughout. She worked for and earned numerous awards, built up her business and produced many qualified agents in the process. One of the instructors, Pat, also a knowledgeable, respected leader who knew the business, more on the leisure side. If you ever had a question, she was always there to help. Our Office Manager, Penny, another respected veteran, who also knew the business. She got her husband into the business. It was her that hired me, guided me through some screw ups, showed some faith in me. I think in time, I paid back the favor. At least I hope I did. Finally, our corporate Manager, Ardie, an expert in the airline computer systems and had the ability to deal and interact with the many executives in the businesses we dealt with. It was she who gave me my first shot at being an actual agent. All of these women, leaders, were mentors and had an influence. All have since departed 😇, but I always think of and appreciate them.
At my second agency, there was Fran. I was managing an agency office in downtown Chicago and actually took over for her in the corporate suburban location. She had some heart issues and needed to step back a little. She stayed on as an agent for awhile and guided me through the land mines of working in that office, and there were many. She never hesitated to give me advice, guide me and answered any questions I might have had. Without her, I would have never succeeded as well as I did. Fran 😇 passed a few years after I left the agency, but to this day, I am thankful for my association with her and her guidance and leadership.
Fast forward a few years to my first railroad gig at the CNW. There were a few who had risen through the ranks. Although they were never “out on the road”, they had all kinds of knowledge and experience in the behind the scenes operation of the railroad. Nothing special, just hard work. I will say, though, this was the first time I started seeing some DEI stuff before it was DEI stuff. There was a female director who was determined to get females and/or minorities (women, not men) into positions of power. Unfortunately two of the three I saw move up probably shouldn’t have. But that’s a story for another day.
Perhaps the best, most influential women I had the pleasure of knowing was when I moved from being a driver to working at headquarters for Pace (suburban bus company). I became the Supervisor of Customer Relations. Mindy, who was the Manager of Communications hired me and was my boss. I have to tell you, to this day, she was by far, no questions asked, the best boss I ever had. She allowed me to oversee my section with little interference, trusted me to control my staff (all female, I might add), treated me fair, and was there for guidance when problems did arise. I had the fortune of telling her how I felt she was the best when I ran into her at a car rental office 10 years after the fact. By then she had moved on to a local pizza corporation in communications, married a local sportscaster and was doing well, quite well - something that did not surprise me in the least.
There was Barb, who was in charge of corporate accounts in Communications who was another smart, strong and influential woman. She was always there to help me, answering questions and who was not afraid to come to me for things I might have known that she didn’t (it really was the other way around most of the time though). At last check, Barb was retired and with her husband living in Tennessee.
One more and perhaps strongest woman I knew at Pace was Melinda Metzger. Melinda started at one of the suburban bus companies that got sucked up when the government took over all the municipal agencies to consolidate funding. When I got to corporate, Melinda was a director, primarily supervising ADA activities. When I had got into it with an ADA advocate over the phone, I knocked on her door, told her what happened and that she could probably expect a call (which she did get). She was a total class act. We talked, she said don’t worry, since she knew first hand of this person and her shenanigans and actually felt I handled incident correctly. Melinda was one I, to this day, have the utmost respect for. She rose through the ranks ultimately to the top and is currently Executive Director, one of the few in the transit business around Chicago who actually knows what the hell she is doing and deserves the position. She definitely earned it, men of the other service boards be damned. If there was someone I’d go back and work for, she’d be the one !
So, there are just a few examples I have come into contact with and experienced their strength, work ethic and quite frankly class. If you work for something, and work hard enough to earn it, the opportunities are there. No woe is me with this group ! And from a Substack point, some of these respected women here stand out and I am honored to have contact with them.
, , , , , , , just to name a few. Check them out - they’ll prove my point. If I’m wrong, I’m sure they take me to task. I admire and respect them all.Someday, with a little good fortune, maybe we will have a face to face meeting, maybe drink some coffee. In the meantime, thank you, Ladies, for being who you are.
The claim that men hate women and that they are "misogynists" must have originated long ago among women who were either willing to put up, but were never asked, or among women who were asked to put up but considered the asking a grievance----- either because they had never to put up that any man would have liked, or becuase what they had to put up was not for men to ask. In the first an third instance we detect "lesbians."
From my book Philosophical Speculations on the Problematic Vagina.
Reserve your copy.
Bravo!